Payne: House-broken Caddy ATS-V

Posted by hpayne on September 27, 2015

Detroit News Auto Critic Henry Payne reviews the 2016

I’ve played tennis for over 40 years and have used a version of the Wilson Pro Staff for the last 25. No matter how long I’m away from the game (as now after getting a new knee), when I return the Wilson feels just right in my hands. The right balance. The right power. The right weight.

The 2016 Cadillac ATS is a Wilson on wheels.

Since I first drove Caddy’s compact performance coupe at its maiden test launch a year ago, we’ve played together a number of times. And each time it feels like we never parted. The right balance. The right power. The right weight. It’s the best-handling tool in the segment when the testosterone rises (eclipsing even you, my old flame BMW 3), yet is a comfortable commuter as well.

When the ATS-V performance version debuted in May, GM invited media to Austin’s epic Formula One track, Circuit of the Americas, to test Caddy’s BMW M3 fighter in the most demanding environment. The twin-turbo, 464-horse, carbon-fiber-trimmed V passed with flying colors, gobbling the curves like it was possessed by Teutonic engineering itself.

But back on Planet Earth, the average ATS-V shopper will never lap their V on COTA. Will never take it to a racetrack, period.

Poor V will never feel the wind across its back at 150 mph. Never get to feel .97 Gs through the esses. Never get to use its Performance Data Recorder to snap off fast laps. Alas, it will mostly sit in a garage for hours on end, just as my Phantom Grey Metallic tester did for a week this September. A $74,635 weapon without a war.

And that’s what makes the ATS-V so good.

It doesn’t have to go nuclear to be appreciated. It’s a perfectly civilized, date-night-with-Mrs. Payne mobile. Like my Wilson racquet, it always feels comfortable in my hand. The leather-scented, Alcantara-lush interior fits just right. The instrument display is intuitive. The engine purrs like a leopard, the magnetic shocks absorb road bumps with grace. I could drive for hours without thinking about the performance-enhancing, aluminum chassis brace hidden underneath. Or the titanium-aluminide turbochargers that can stuff the cylinder heads with 444 foot pounds of tire-smoking torque.

By contrast, two competitive vehicles in the ATS-V’s price range that I’ve tested recently– the $81,425 BMW M3 and $76,465 Corvette C7 with Z51 trim package – don’t have as polite daily table manners. The M3 and C7 want red meat all the time.

Turn the key on the washboard-stiff Bimmer and it growls like an empty stomach. Its gaping front air intakes are King Kong’s nostrils. The car itches like a case of poison ivy to be floored. The C7 is worse.

The interior has a chemical smell. Like a boxer oiled for a fight. Its shark-like visage attracts police radar guns up to 10 miles away. Nail the throttle over 3000 RPM and unleash the Kraken’s roar.

The ATS-V is more subtle, yet every bit as lethal when force is required.

Approaching Telegraph Road on Lone Pine, a modified Mustang with a hood bulge the size of Mount Everest spied the V-badge on the back of my Caddy and glued himself to my rear end spoiling for a fight. Just before the 90-degree turn onto Telegraph I downshifted into second – like butter with the V’s digital rev-matching – then danced the beautifully-balanced Alpha chassis across the apex under power. Glancing in the rear view mirror, I saw the ’Stang strain to keep up, its tail slewing right to left like it was swatting horse-flies. My eyes got back to the tac in time to see the needle rocketing to the 6,500 redline. Third gear. Fourth. I was gone.

Living with V isn’t all wine and roses, though. Optimized for dry-weather performance, its low-ground clearance and rear-wheel-drive won’t be much fun come winter. For those who covet an all-season performance ATS, the AWD, 321-horse V-6 Caddy is a tasty alternative for $20K less. The V’s chiseled body is pleasingly athletic, but the fearsome, chain-link grille is too severe to look at every day. Inside, the haptic-touch, CUE infotainment system quickly wears out its novelty. Especially when GM’s coach-class brand, Chevy, has upgraded its infotainment system with First Class Cadillac systems like 4G WiFi and Apple Car Play — not to mention a much more intuitive touchscreen with redundant dials. Anyone do console transplants?

But every marriage has its compromises. If those details don’t bother you, then Cadillac has built the best all-around, small luxury performance sedan on the market today. It’s a car you can live with. And play with.

2016 Cadillac ATS-V

Vehicle type: Front-engine, rear-wheel-drive, four-passenger coupe/sedan

Price: $61,460 base ($74,635 as tested)

Power plant: 6-liter, twin-turbo V-6

Power: 464 horsepower, 444 pound-feet of torque

Transmission: Six-speed manual (optional eight-speed automatic)

Performance: 0-60 mph, 3.8 seconds; 189 mph top speed (manufacturer)

Weight: 3,750 pounds

Fuel economy: EPA 16 mpg city/24 mpg highway (auto transmission); 17 mpg city/23 mpg highway (manual)

Report card

Highs: Nimble handling; Comfortable daily driver

Lows: Metal-mouth smile; No fun in the snow

Overall:★★★★

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